Then you showed up, then bam! They was trippin' over themselves like babies in the woods. Can I tell you that you was great back there? Those guards! They thought they was all of that. Incredible! Shrek: Are you talkin' to- me? Whoa! Donkey: Yes, I was talkin' to you. Shrek: Oh, really? You and what army? Donkey: Can I say somethin' to you? Listen, you was really, really somethin' back there. Ogre! Shrek: Aye? Captain of the Guards: By the order of Lord Farquaad, I am authorized to place you both under arrest, and transport you to a designated, resettlement facility. Captain of the Guards: Seize him! Guard 7: After him! He's getting away! Guard 8: Get him! This way! Turn! Captain of the Guards: You there. You might have seen a housefly, maybe even a superfly, but I bet you ain't never seen a donkey fly. Oh! He can talk! Donkey: Hey, I can fly! Peter Pan: He can fly! Pigs: He can fly! Captain of the Guards: He can talk! Donkey: Ha, ha! That's right, fool! Now I'm a flying, talking, donkey. Captain of the Guards: Get her out of my sight. I'm the talkingest damn thing you ever saw. Guards! Old Lady: No, no, he talks! He does. Talk, you boneheaded dolt- Captain of the Guards: That's it. Captain of the Guards: Well? Old Lady: Oh, oh, he's just- He's just a little nervous. Well, that's good for ten shillings, if you can prove it. Pinocchio: Help me! Captain of the Guards: What have you got? Old Lady: Well, I've got a talking donkey. Pinocchio: Father, please! Don't let them do this! Captain of the Guards: Next. Captain of the Guards: Five shillings for the possessed toy. Please! Give me another chance! Old Lady: Oh, shut up! Donkey: Oh! Captain of the Guards: Next! What have you got? Geppetto: This little wooden puppet. Guard 5: Come on! Guard 6: Sit down there! Keep quiet! Bear: This cage is too small. Guard 4: Get up! Captain of the Guards: Twenty pieces. Captain of the Guards: That's 20 pieces of silver for the witch. Get up! Captain of the Guards: Next! Guard 3: Give me that! Your flying days are over. Fairy tale creatures." Guard 1: All right. Shrek: This is the part where you run away. Villager 3: Back! Back, beast! Back! I warn ya! Villager 3: Right. Squeeze the jelly from your eyes! Actually, it's quite good on toast. Villager 3: No! Shrek: They'll shave your liver. They'll make a suit from your freshly peeled skin. Shrek: Yes, well, actually, that would be a giant. Do you know what that thing could do to you? Villager 2: Yeah, it'll grind your bones for its bread. ♪ Villagers: Think it's in there? All right! Let's get it! Villager 1: Whoa. And all that glitters is gold, only shootin' stars break the mold. Hey, now, you're a rock star, get the show on, get paid. ♪ Villagers: Go! Go! Steve Harwell: ♪ Go. ♪ Steve Harwell: ♪ Get your game on, go play. My world's on fire, how 'bout yours? That's the way I like it and I'll never get bored. The ice we skate is gettin' pretty thin, the water's getting warm so you might as well swim. But the meteor men beg to differ judging by the hole in the satellite picture. It's a cool place, and they say it gets colder, you're bundled up now, but wait till you get older. You'll never know if you don't go, you'll never shine if you don't glow. So much to do, so much to see, so what's wrong with takin' the backstreets. Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb. The years start comin', and they don't stop comin', fed to the rules and I hit the ground runnin', didn't make sense not to live for fun. She was lookin' kind of dumb with her finger and her thumb in the shape of an "L" on her forehead. Steve Harwell: ♪ Somebody once told me the world is gonna roll me, I ain't the sharpest tool in the shed. Shrek: What a load of- Shrek hops out his outhouse and his routine like taking a mud shower and farting in his pool. She waited in the dragon's keep, in the highest room of the tallest tower, for her true love and true love's first kiss." Like that's ever gonna happen. Many brave knights had attempted to free her from the dreadful prison, but none prevailed. She was locked away in a castle, guarded by a terrible fire-breathing dragon. But she had an enchantment upon her of a fearful sort, which could only be broken by love's first kiss. Once upon a time, there was a lovely princess.
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